The Natural Chode

Sexual attraction makes all the difference.

So a question I hear a lot is “How do I create sexual attraction with a girl I’m into?”

There are doods out there who can approach a woman, talk to her, get her number, even meet up with her and spend time together, but still can’t seal the deal.

I struggled with this myself, putting in years observing and learning from guys who were really good wit girls. Then trying new things out and feeling the awesome satisfaction of getting a phone number from a cutie or even a girl agreeing to hang out with me, only to suffer the rejection of finding out she wasn’t into me “like that”.

And that hurts.

Especially for guys like us who have invested in being MORE attractive. I remember feeling frustrated as hell, even questioning all of the time I had put in, thinking “was it really worth it?” and “what had I actually learned?”.

Well, it turned out it was, and I had. And the answer wasn’t even as complicated as I thought.

I wanted to know what causes sexual attraction. And not the ‘oh he’s cute” kind of attraction where she likes you but still doesn’t wanna fuck. I mean SEXUAL attraction. The kind that makes her WANT you, not the kind that makes her LIKE you. What causes that? And how could I do it myself?

You see, the rules we learned – were wrong. All the bullshit we’ve been taught, just doesn’t work. Acting like you need to win her approval by trying to demonstrate that you’re valuable is no bueno. And tying to impress her with how nice/polite/respectful/funny/entertaining you are will pretty much always result in the opposite of any kind of real attraction.

First, understand these 2 basic levels of attraction…

Level 1 – Interest
Level 2 – Desire

The first level is easy. Because all you really have to do is be relatively tolerable. Decent social skills and something to say will get you this far. But the second level is really what I was after. And it’s what I think you’re after too.

So how do you do it?

The best answer I can give you is this: dynamism.

You can be a total 1-trick-pony and get a girl to “like” you, even to show up and hang out with you. But to get deeper inside, to move her from liking you to wanting you, it takes a more dynamic approach. You have to be able to do your thing with her in a way that creates anticipation. And dynamic expression is the best way I’ve found to do that.

I just listened to a free mp3 of a friend of mine, Richard LaRuina, where he talks about exactly this here. You can check it out here.

Richard calls it “slipping her into a seductive state”. And he gives you 3 things you can do – actual specific techniques – that allow you to do this with absolutely any chick interested.

Thing 1 – Slow down your speech

Thing 2 – Pause

Thing 3 – Hold eye contact

First, notice that a sexual state is characteristically chill. It’s not hyped up and over-the-top. If you are already pretty melow this will be a natural progression. But if you are in super social mode, you’ll need to downshift.

Second, understand that the way you can cause that sexual state in her this in by GOING FIRST. Point being – If she is attracted to you, she will follow. Getting her into that sexual mood, where she feels comfortable showing you her desires, means starting with yourself. So lead the way.

Third, know that the above techniques are useless without GOING FIRST as I’ve mentioned. If the technique is like a car, sexual leading is like the fuel. And you won’t get very far without a full tank.

So that’s about it. Hope you’ve enjoyed reading. I’ve definitely enjoyed writing this one for y’all.

Later,

-B